Siren is a new dating app invented by Seattle’s Susie Lee (pictured above with Bill Clinton). Siren, she says, is “inspired by real life dynamics. There are a few key principles: people can’t have fun if they don’t feel safe; women value personal agency in physical and digital space, and both men and women want opportunities for hints of personalities to shine to discover each other.”

Siren is often cited as the “anti-creep” dating app, but Lee says, “a defensive stance has never been a driving force in the design of Siren. We’re pro-human. We believe that most people aren’t creepy, but it only takes a few to ruin good things. So we just create a platform where icky behavior simply gets no positive reinforcement.”

WOW!

The Monarch had a chance to chat with Lee about the app and her plans for the future. Enjoy!

What’s been the response – both from the public and the tech industry – to Siren?

The response to Siren beta has been extremely positive—the media attention began in April 2014, with Seattle Magazine and has accelerated to nearly 100 different media outlets, which have acknowledged the interest and demand for Siren. The in-depth coverage include ThinkProgress, Marie Claire, Cosmopolitan, the front page of the Seattle Times, Engadget, Washington Post,  Mirror, TechTimes, The Stranger, K5News, and Geekwire, cross-pollinating with blogs, social media reposts, and person-to-person recommendations. The media buzz continues, with interviews requested for national TV programs and speaking engagements.

The requests for invite codes have also been positive in the most human and supportive ways:

“Read an article and was excited and at the same time disappointed that it’s not available in my area. Putting off all dating sites until Siren comes here…”

“I read the recent CNN article, and to be perfectly honest, it’s brilliant…having gone through other online sites, I’m just eager to give this a go. Best wishes for a prosperous venture.”

“I love your idea. I’ve been trying these other sites this year. I’ve had trouble with all of them in one way or another, thinking do they all need to be combined? NO, you answered my question.”

“I’m currently paying for match.com, and I’ve tried okC and tinder. I don’t have a favorable opinion of any of them, and I’m quite frustrated with 1/20 messages being replied to and then never going anywhere. So I found myself looking for another dating site/app and I stumbled across an article about Siren and thought this sounds exactly like what I’ve been looking for.”

“Horrified by my online dating experience years ago, I cannot wait until your app is available on Android because I am excited to try it out. Thank you so much for your visionary product…”

A local community of patient and generous individuals in the start-up and tech world and tech organizations such as New Tech Seattle, Geekwire and 601 Club have offered their support, enthusiasm, advice, connections, and empathy from the beginning. These networks continue to provide scaffolding as we make it from one milestone to another. There have only been a small handful of naysayers, and they’re kind of hilarious because they throw out tired phrases like, “Dunno how this is repeatable and scalable…” as if any start up just magically became those things, and then they express doubt that I know how women think.

Is it a strange experience to be a woman creating the infrastructure for a dating app?

Not at all. A woman can create the infrastructure for a dating app or a nuclear power plant.

Or perhaps, we could argue the opposite, and that as an artist, I encourage and elicit strange experiences when pushing the boundaries of my uncomfortable zone and exploring “I don’t know” spaces.

What was the moment when you realized Siren should exist? What function does the app serve, exactly?

When I shifted from a flip phone to the iPhone a little over a year ago, I observed, like an anthropologist, people’s behavior with their devices. At the same time, I heard numerous stories from my friends frustrated by the difficulty of meeting people and the generally lackluster experiences on different dating sites, as well as the number of new sites that claimed to be the next new thing. My work as a digital artist explores technology to augment human connections, so I began to investigate the old models and the newcomers, and I thought: Oh, these are stupid. It felt like: “Bargain Basement Shopping” (for girl/boyfriends) or like an endless, not-fun series of job interviews with a lot of noisy, irrelevant data and over-sharing. I also was very conscious of being over-exposed, having no control of the dynamic, and being reduced to some stereotype that was completely inaccurate.

None of the sites made any sense because each didn’t feel like the ways people meet in real life. Real life has asymmetry that facilitates meta-signals between women and men, and it’s a lot more intriguing and fun. Siren is inspired by those real life dynamics. There are a few key principles: people can’t have fun if they don’t feel safe; women value personal agency in physical and digital space, and both men and women want opportunities for hints of personalities to shine to discover each other. People often say that we’re anti-creep, but a defensive stance has never been a driving force in the design of Siren. We’re pro-human. We believe that most people aren’t creepy, but it only takes a few to ruin good things. So we just create a platform where icky behavior simply gets no positive reinforcement.

And to be honest, the goal isn’t Siren weddings or Siren hookups—what two people want is navigated privately between themselves. Our only goal is to create a space that allows people to feel good about meeting others—that energy translates to other parts of life as open curiosity and a willingness to engage, and that’s a great energy to send out in the world.

Have you heard any stories from users about unique, super-positive experiences?

One of the sweetest messages was sent to me recently: “Dear Susie, If I never use your app again, it is not because I don’t think it’s totally awesome. Because it is. The reason I may never use your app again is because I have met too many lovely people…I had a lovely first date with one and a second is already scheduled. There was enough information on each other’s pages to get a convo started and no more. Which was just enough to get genuine communication going without the over-sharing that other sites usually encourage. You have a great product. I enjoy it immensely. I met a wonderful woman. Thank you.”

What was the biggest negative dating experience you were told about with other apps that lead you to think Siren was necessary?

There are horror stories with all the major dating sites, click-bait that simply reinforces a culture of fear. There are funny blogs and presentations that try to out-algorithm the algorithms, consolidate the weird messages, and create meta-commentaries on dating culture. There are also exposé type projects that take advantage of users to humiliate them, further a particular agenda, or underscore society’s supposed superficiality. I’d prefer to focus on the challenge of helping strangers gently become less strange to each other.

Do you have an ideal first date experience of your own, either fictional or real, you’d like to talk about?

I generally form few narratives and expectations of ideal anythings, but I love hearing stories of people meeting other good people from Siren, and whether it is one time or something more, and saying that they feel noticed and valued for who they are.

What’s next for you?

We’re going to roll out a version 2.0 of Siren very soon that we’re really excited to launch in Seattle. We’d like to get it right in our hometown first, and then expand city-by-city. There is already enthusiastic demand in a number of places, and people have been so supportive and ready to help us spread the word when we get there. It’s going to be such an interesting year.