I was drunk on television once; no one noticed except a pumpkin hair-do, blonde, cute, primly seated next to me on a meet-the-media set. She smiled and said I looked relaxed. We fired at a governor running for senator who had married a president’s daughter. He lost because he received a massage by a former Miss Virginia with a pumpkin hair-do, blonde, cute, at the Pierre Hotel in New York. The winner was a famous football coach’s son, but he later blew his chances for reelection by calling blacks ‘ca-cas’. By then, the former Miss Virginia had posed for Playboy. I never appeared on television again.